Everybody knows that unicorns are jerks, so the invention of the omnicorn is most welcome here in this pep song for a creature with every type of horn. (Bronies identify the omnicorn as a different type of horned creature that you can read about if you like to use Google. Also, bronies are adult male My Little Pony fans. Who are the judges of reality now? I ask you.)
“Another Weirdo” is an instrumental with pleasant saxophone but doesn’t warrant further analysis because covers and instrumentals (and, heaven forbid, spoken word) are not as interesting. Which swiftly brings us to “I Made A Mess”: It’s the winner of the three. The song’s vocal melody climbs along with the hysteria associated with the titular mess until it bottoms out. That’s how messes work.
The staleness of this exercise has not escaped me. It is Week 34. Walter Payton week. That’s why we’re introducing an exciting new feature to Phoning It In. It’s called “Insane And Unsolicited Advice To They Might Be Giants.” This week’s advice? Add a third John to the band. I mean, if the Ramones could find that many band members with the surname “Ramone,” it shouldn’t be too difficult to find a third, fifth or seventh John.
“Another Weirdo”: 4/10
“I Made A Mess”: 8/10