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Spoon Disinters Cramps Gem On “Conan”

A dead-boring set of interviews with a pair of giggling, self-appointed TV show “stars” on Conan last night was thankfully followed by a rare musical gem. Recreated by MAGNET fave Spoon, it turned out to be an historic performance that deserves to begin running non-stop on a giant billboard in front of the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fameā€”if they’ve got the balls.

Spoon played vintage, skull-exploding Cramps epic “TV Set” and wrung every last bit of psychotic mayhem from the original, cut by “Elvis From Hell” lead singer Lux Interior, rhythm guitarist Poison Ivy and crew, back in the early ’80s. Spoon’s dynamic frontman Britt Daniel and ace guitarist Alex Fischel added all the right buzzsaw, curare-tipped fretboard darts that helped to somewhat mask the song’s ghoulish lyrics. Probably a good thing or the show’s producers might never have let them perform it on TV.

As a public service, MAGNET is here to fan away the Jim Jones-tainted, Kool-Aid shower of purple fog from the libretto so you can get the full impact of what you may have thought you heard. Here you go: a song whose lyrics were inspired by no less a literary trio than those banned EC horror comic-book hosts of 60 years ago: the Crypt Keeper, the Old Hag and the Vault Keeper.

“TV Set”
Oh baby I see you on my TV set
Yeah baby I see you on my TV set
I cut your head off and put it in my TV set
I use your eyeballs for dials on my TV set
I watch TV I watch TV since I put you in my TV set

Oh baby I hear you on my radio
Yeah baby I hear you on my radio
You know I flip flip flip for your radio
You’re going drip drip drip on my radio
AM radio, PM radio, since I tuned you inside my radio

Oh baby I see you in my frigidaire
Yeah baby I see you in my frigidaire
Behind the mayonnaise way in the back
I’m gonna see you tonight for a midnight snack
But though it’s cold, you won’t get old
Because you’re well-preserved in my frigidaire

Oh baby looks so good in my crib at night
Yeah baby looks so good in my crib at night
I could give you a million hugs
You look so good all covered up with bugs
I missed some there, under your chair
But that’s all right, I’ll sweep you under the rug