Neil Nathan Inc. Makes Magnet A Mix Tape

Sweep The Nation is the latest release from Neil Nathan. We were so impressed by it that we asked him to make us a mix tape. He did and sent this note with it: “Hello MAGNET-loving humanoids. You may call me the Overlord. I come from a star system you call Sirius, the Dog Star. And this is not the first time I’ve been to your lovely little planet. I am a messenger, and as Marlon Brando put it in one of my favorite films of yours, Apocalypse Now, I am also an errand boy sent by grocery clerks. The truth is I’m simply carrying out orders from a general who’s been cleverly pulling the strings here on Earth since you Homo sapiens were first designed by us, so many years ago. This time, my charge is to usher in the next phase of your species’ evolution. Or should I say revolution? They are very closely intertwined as you’ll see. I have played this role millions of times before, in millions of solar systems across this galaxy. But I plan to have an immense amount of fun this time. Largely because I just love your rock ‘n’ roll music. Specifically that of T.Rex, Queen, David Bowie, the Stooges, Cheap Trick and Guided By Voices. (By the way, those voices have often been my fellow custodial rulers and I having a good laugh while Bob Pollard drinks himself into a stupor.) But I digress. This mix tape is a grand opportunity to clarify a few bits of disinformation about your true origins and the very intimate connection between our two species. I will do this through some of my favorite extra-terrestrial and outer-space-inspired rock songs.”

“Sweep The Nation” (download):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Guided By Voices “Class Clown Spots A UFO”
As previously mentioned, my fellow custodial rulers and I have had a ball possessing this obscenely talented Midwest drunkard. Ask yourself, how else would it be possible for a mere mortal to be this prolific? Deep down, he knows the truth of it. He put it right there in the band’s name. This number is the catchiest little golden nugget imaginable. Speaking of gold. That is why my fellow custodial rulers and I designed your species in the first place. We needed you to mine this gold for us so we could heal the atmosphere of one of our planets in nearby Vega, where your silly little first cousins wreaked havoc on their atmosphere, just as you are doing. Video

Engines “Sunfish”
This teenage wunderkind shockingly hit the nail on the head in the bridge of his new song. “And we lost all the time we thought was granted to us by the gods of the sun, the aliens that made us die. I tossed another new religion to the sky, as Eve and Adam laughed and waved goodbye.” He is thoroughly correct; we designed you do die young. We didn’t want to give you too much time to figure out your plight as our gold mining slaves and make a mess of things. Due to the delicate nature of this information, my fellow custodial rulers and I feel it best if we keep this song under the radar for the time being, so it is only available for special MAGNET-loving humanoids. Audio

The Rolling Stones “2,000 Light Years From Home”
In fact, I’m only 8.6 light years from home. And I’m not lonely in the least as I have the Stones’ entire catalog on vinyl to keep me company. The warm sound of vinyl is one of your species’ greatest technological achievements. I’m glad to see that you are re-embracing it with such fervor. Video

William Shatner “Rocket Man”
This Elton John cover by the great thespian who so deftly played your Captain Kirk is quite apropos, as he was thoroughly schooled in Star Fleet’s Prime Directive: Never interfere with a species’ natural development. But the real truth is we have been guiding your physical, spiritual, emotional and socio-political evolution every step of the way. This Prime Directive was designed for monks. And that simply is not us. That’s why it’s called science fiction, you misguided Trekkies. Video

The Church “Under The Milky Way”
This song is perhaps the best galactic road song in history. It never fails to put me in a calm and pensive mood while I hurdle through the galaxy at light speed through one of our many worm holes. Video

Deep Purple “Space Truckin’”
This one’s also on my Worm Hole Galactic Road mix. It flows nicely out of the shoe gazing chillness of the Church and is the perfect accompaniment with the Worm Hole Multi-Colored Light Speed Show. Unfortunately, I was on an exploratory mission in our neighboring Andromeda Galaxy during your cultural golden age of the ’60s and as such, I did not get a chance to take in the Joshua Light Show at the Filmore East, but I assure you the Worm Hole Light Speed Show cannot be equaled. Video

Frank Zappa “Inca Roads”
Yes, Frank we did land in the Andes and at many other sites around the planet; wherever it was necessary to mine the aforementioned gold. I know you’re taking the piss on this one, Frank, and I love you for it. But those Nazca Lines were necessary from time to time as a safeguard in case our guidance systems failed. Yes, we too are fallible. Just a few thousand years ahead of you. Video

Perry Farrell’s Satellite Party “Wish Upon A Dog Star”
Like Bob Pollard, this young humanoid also blurs his senses repeatedly, though with substances of the hallucinogenic variety. It is very easy to insert myself into their thought forms when they are in this condition. I was feeling a bit homesick when I penned this one for him and needed a bit of an ego stroke. In hindsight, it was all a bit much, but I enjoyed it at the time. “With all my love I overflow the river Nile/Rolling on for thousands of miles/I am heaven in the spirit of the sun.” Video

Fountains Of Wayne “I Want An Alien For Christmas”
Well here I am, gentlemen. Merry Christmas. I don’t want to upset you, but Jesus was an alien hybrid, thus his superhuman powers. And Mary was impregnated not so immaculately by one of my fellow custodial rulers. He had a thing for young, innocent human females. Video

David Bowie “Starman”
Yes, my friends, I have come to “meet” you. And no I don’t think it will “blow your minds.” You’re much stronger than you give yourselves credit for. Though his current sporting of hoodies and other humdrum preppie fashions has my fellow custodial rulers and me in quite a tizzy, David did a simply glamtastic job getting you ready for our arrival and for your glorious evolution. Video

Pearl Jam “Do The Evolution”
In this punky homage to modern Homo sapiens, Eddie Vedder cynically rages on about your mammalian “progress,” like only a man stuck in time can. As a humanoid with a bit more of an unstuck-in-time, galactic perspective than Mr. Vedder, I can assure you that the techno-socio-political transformation you are now undergoing will result in a much more thoughtful, conscious “planning” of your glorious destiny. Homo Democratus is right around the corner my friends. Video

Finally I would be remiss if I didn’t turn you on to the oh so hip and agile band of Earthlings that I front, Neil Nathan Inc. Our new LP, Sweep The Nation, is essential listening for this very crucial next phase in humanity’s development. Video

Trust me my friends, we will indeed be doing your evolution.

All hail the Overlord.

All hail woman and mankind.

This entry was posted in MIX TAPE. Bookmark the permalink. Both comments and trackbacks are currently closed.